Power Rankings #4: Hammond's

I purchased all eight of these bars at Central Market in Mill Creek for $2.99/piece. They look great, don't they?!

Well, they were NOT great. These bars ARE NOT worth $2.99 a piece. They are only one very tiny tiny tiny step above American mass market chocolate, in my opinion. I even witnessed cocoa butter bloom for the first time since starting this adventure.

 














And the winner of this weeks power rankings (winner of the losers):

 1. **Peanut Butter Cup - dark chocolate with peanut butter - Aside from the cocoa butter bloom, and smoky aftertaste, this bar was decent. Not great though. Bummer, cause I looooove chocolate/pb combos. I really wanted to like this one.

2. **Toffee Brittle - dark chocolate with toffee - This was one of the best bar of the six for sure (not that that is saying much)... I didn't even mind finishing this one. Still, the toffee made it overly sweet. And that aftertaste... it was harder to notice with the dark chocolate, than milk...but still...gross.

3. **Sea Side Caramel - dark chocolate with sea salt caramel - Well...the first ingredient for this one-sugar...hm. 27g. That’s quite a bit. There are 4g fiber though which makes me feel a little better. But enough about nutrition facts. It's poor quality chocolate. But poor quality dark chocolate tastes better than poor quality milk, I am learning.

4. */*Red Velvet Cake - milk chocolate with red velvet cake ganache - Sounds soooo good, right?! These bars are so mean! I would eat it again...but only if it was the only thing around. Which happens...you know...when you get to the point where you are eating chocolate chips for a chocolate fix? Or is that just me? The red velvet flavor is really fun in this bar...but the whole thing is a little too sweet. That is why red velvet goes so well with cream cheese frosting, right? To balance it out? The uber sweet is what stops me from giving it a solid **.

5. *Sea Side Caramel - milk chocolate with sea salt caramel - This is the first bar I tried. I read the ingredients before hand...first listed is SUGAR-which isn’t THAT crazy for a milk chocolate especially with caramel...but 33g in this bar. Plus...it is terrible. Ok...not terrible...I finished it (but I am quite an addict). It’s definitely NOT worth $2.99. Poor quality chocolate. Maybe that is why this brand doesn’t have any plain chocolate bars, they are all inclusion bars. There was a bad aftertaste. And I didn’t taste ANY sea salt. BOOO!

6. *Malted Milkshake - milk chocolate with malted milk - There was nothing malted about this milkshake. The flavor was almost there...but it was just off. And after spending a good amount of time in the UK...I know malted. This bar tasted processed and chemically. Gross.

7. *Pigs N’ Taters - milk chocolate with crispy bacon bits & potato chips - I gave this bar to a friend for Christmas. And now I am embarrassed that I did. I can hear Gordon Ramsey saying "Never send something out with out tasting it yourself!" hahhahaha. I’ve had bacon in chocolate before and enjoyed it. This bar has potato chips too...but it didn’t add flavor...just crunchy texture. It wasn’t as smoky as the Chuao bacon bar was...but still more than jives with my tastebuds.

8. *Sweet & Spicy - dark chocolate with chipotle - This bar reminded me of the Chuao firecracker bar. Ah, my mouth was burning. I did not like it. One bite, and I was done! At least the Firecracker bar had pop rocks too! 

In summary...I would not like them in a box, I would not like them with a fox. I would eat a few if I was really in need of a fix (and let's be honest, it happens). But the rest, I am happy to never touch my tastebuds again!

CHEERS!

Power Rankings #3: Alter Eco

Because Alter Eco is a brand that makes a lot more than just chocolate, I went into these power rankings with lower expectations for quality. I was quickly proved wrong when even the bars I didn't care for had really nice flavor balance and quality (there was only one of the 8 bars that I wouldn't eat again). The box-type packaging was particularly useful in my case. (I keep eating all my bars before I get a chance to take photos.) The boxes make it impossible to tell how much chocolate is or is not there. ;) 

I purchased these bars at Whole Foods in Lynnwood, WA. They happened to be on sale when I bought them ($3, on sale from $3.99/bar). There are two bars missing from my power rankings- "Dark Brown Butter" and "Deep Dark Sea Salt." Deal with it. :)

1. ***Dark Velvet - "a touch of milk MELTY SMOOTH" - 47% cocoa - Nice snap, especially for a milkier chocolate. This one had me saying “MMMMMMMMM CHOCOLATE”. I LOVE a good quality milk and they are SO few and far between.

2. ***Dark Mint - "cool crispy mint BOLD AND BRISK" - 60% cocoa - There is something so refreshing about a good combo of mint and chocolate. MMMMMM. I started eating this bar with no intention of finishing it all. I had to stop and write this review before gobbling the whole thing up. And now I’m left with the delicious aftertaste - the true mark of quality chocolate.

3. ***Dark Cacao - "crunchy cocoa nibs BITTERSWEET BITE" - 63% cocoa - I like the crunchy of the nibs and the slight bitterness it adds to the bar. It is still plenty sweet. A great combo of bitter and sweet.

4. **Dark Quinoa - "nutty toasted quinoa LIGHT CRISPY CRUNCH" - 60% cocoa - This unique bar is clever. I am always a fan of crunchy chocolate, you can hardly tell this is quinoa. Upon reading the labels, there isn’t a significant nutritional difference between this and other similar bars, like one might assume.

5. **Dark Almond - "slow-roasted TOASTY NUT" - 60% cocoa - This is a good bar. Not great. Forgettable but pleasant. I feel like I’m beginning to sound like Simon Cowell.

6. **Dark Coconut Toffee - "butter and sea salt CRUNCHY AND TOASTED" - 47% cocoa - I am not usually a big fan of toffee...but this bar was so deliciously milk chocolatey smooth that I quite enjoyed it. There was some saltiness which was nice, but I feel like that is executed better in other bars. I would eat it again, but given a choice I’d go for the straight milk “Dark Velvet.” Sidenote - I don’t know why this brand calls all of their bars “DARK” when two of them were 47% cocoa and very milky in flavor…

7. **Dark Blackout - "bittersweet cocoa DEEP FRUITY INTENSITY" - 85% cocoa - I can definitely taste the fruitiness of the dark chocolate. It’s just not something I enjoy enough to choose. The nib bar was a much more preferable dark for me. Although, there are 10g of fiber and only 12g of sugar in an entire bar (2 servings)! A FiberOne bar only has 9g of fiber but also less sugar at 10g. All in all...pretty comparable!

8. *Dark Twist - "crystallized orange peel VIBRANT AND TANGY" - 60% cocoa - This bar has a good flavor balance with the orange. The “crystallized orange peel” chunks could have been smaller to give it a smoother feel. Some of them were big enough to get stuck in my teeth which makes me prefer Chuao for a dark chocolate orange fix. 

Have you ever had Alter Eco chocolate? What do you think of my rankings? We'll see this brand again when I move on to truffles. 

Cheers!

Power Rankings #2: chuao - dark

1. ***orange-a-go-go - "Candied orange harmonizes with the essence of bergamot orange in dark chocolate" - The first thing I notice is it smells of orange. There is a good texture with bits of candied orange. Nice balance of flavors. I’d pick this over a chocolate orange (which kind of says a lot).  
   
   
2. ***ohh ahh almond - "Crunchy whole almonds, kettle cooked in sugar & sea salt, delight in dark chocolate" - I am such a sucker for almonds and chocolate. Salted almond takes it a notch further. I really had to work hard to stop eating this bar and move on to another. 


3. ***salted chocolate crunch - "Crunchy, toasted breadcrumbs dusted with sea salt and swirled in dark chocolate" - I’m starting to really like this whole breadcrumbs-in-chocolate thing. Love the saltiness with the crunch of the bread in the chocolate. Yum Yum!


4. ***spicy maya - "Seductive cinnamon, pasilla chile and warming cayenne bedded in dark chocolate - This bar was surprisingly lovely. The first smell is of cinnamon and the chile and cayenne is fabulous. I’m not a huge fan of spicy spicy...so this is done quite well! It  warms to warm you right up and could really come in handy in the winter.


5. **pretzel toffee twirl - "crunchy mini pretzels and buttery toffee dance in dark chocolate" - This bar is reminicent of a gourmet Take Five, minus the carmel (which is fine by me!). I do wish there were more pretzels. I should have take a picture of how neatly the pretzels are aligned on the back of the bar. I love the way chuao does that with what they put in their bars. But, I am a big fan of getting all the flavors in every bite and that just wasn't possible with the small number of pretzels and how they were arranged. Also, I’m really starting to feel like toffee is overdone. 
    
6. **honeycomb -  "Lusious amber honey, caramelized into crisp bits and enrobed in dark chocolate" - The honey adds a nice sweetness to the dark chocolate. The caramelized bits add a nice crunch texture. This is a good bar. There are a lot of others I would pick before this one though.


7.  *triple nut tempation -  "A decadent array of whole roasted almonds, hazelnuts and pistachios nestled in dark chocolate" - This bar is not so much of a temptation for me. I think it’s the pistachios that throw me off here. Yup. I’m also not a huge fan of hazelnuts...which is crazy right (it’s true I think Nutella is meh...it’s good but I’m not crazy like the rest of the world and that’s because of the hazelnuts…)? I hope Jordan likes this one, cause I’m not going to finish it. Back to ooh ahh almond for me!


8. *firecracker -  "Sultry sea salt, smoky chipotle, and popping candy exploding in dark chocolate" - The exploding candy is awesome, again. But I’m glad they have it in the pop corn pop because the spice has more kick in this one...a little too much for my liking. But a very interesting bar. I would not buy it for ME but I would buy it for someone else who likes spice with a good kick. 
   
   Have you ever tried a Chuao bar? What do you think of my rankings? As luck would have it, the DAY after I finished eating the dark bars, they released two new flavors...

So...I may have to do a round 3 of Chuao tastings...which I'm certainly NOT complaining about! 

Cheers!

Reading List

Currently reading:

Finished (and loved):

 

 

 

In the queue:

 

Have any great chocolate-reading recommendations?

Power Rankings #1 : chuao - milk

this scale will be used in all further power rankings

Here we are. My first Power Rankings revealed...

I had a great time tasting all of the chuao bars. I found the chocopods to be the PERFECT size for tasting (though for some of the best bars, I wished I’d had the full-sized to munch on). The flavors are very unique and interesting. The packaging is lovely, eye-catching and modern. The descriptions of the flavors on the packaging were VERY accurate (these descriptions are italicized in the rankings below). Also, I didn’t notice until one of the last bars (I wasn't even looking at the chocolate as I shoved it in my face...), but each piece has a delicious word on it: 

I didn't have such a great time finding all of the bars. Central Market sells 12 of the 15 flavors:

The "firecracker" I picked up in my 8 piece chocopod variety pack from THE CHOCOLATE BOX ($16). But there were two in particular that were more difficult. I found the "oh my s'mores!" at REI ($6). The Pretzel Toffee Twirl (a dark bar), I had to get online from chuaochocolatier.com ($4, on sale from $6 + shipping).

I decided to break up my rankings for this brand into 2 groups - milk and dark.

So...without further adieu...

1. *** potato chip - "Crisp kettle cooked potato chips and a hint of sea salt mix and mingle in milk chocolate" - I tried not to eat the whole thing, but I couldn’t stop with this one. I read somewhere that the workers hand crush the chips so they are a nice size. Why have I never put potato chips and chocolate together? It’s brilliant!
   
2. ***pop corn pop - "Inspired by that familiar flavor you love, with a surprising POP in milk chocolate" - “surprising pop” is right! There is pop rock candy (unflavored) in this bar! There is a nice hint of butter flavor but it still tastes like delicious chocolate. FUN! I want more. 
   
3. ***ravishing rocky road - "Salted caramelized almonds and chewy marshmallows pave the way in milk chocolate" - sometimes, I really love a good chunk-the almonds and small marshmallows are whole. The almonds are salted to perfection to give this bar a wonderful smooth balance.
   
4. **oh my s’mores - "Fluffy marshmallows and crushed honey graham crackers reunite in milk chocolate" - very similar to the rocky road bar except, obviously, sans almonds and plus graham crackers. I think this bar would stand out more in the dark chocolate variety. Overall, it was very enjoyable...I just would probably choose another bar to eat. 
   
5. **sweet & salty - "A touch of sea salt swirled in milk chocolate" - the "touch" of salt is not enough for me...left me wanting more. It was still a good bar with smooth texture.  
   
6. *maple bacon -  "Crisp bacon, delicate maple sweetness and bonfire smoked sea salt, bathed in milk chocolate" - this is the first chocolate bar I can think of tasting that I wished I hadn't. The very first taste is sweet maple...then BAM (like Emeril) smokey smokey flavor. I like the saltiness of the bacon and the sweet of the maple but the chocolate flavor is completely drowned in smokiness. The last bite was actually much milder, but I don’t think I’d buy this bar again.
   
   
   

   
   So there ya have it! I was quite pleased with this selection of milk chocolate bars! It is so hard to find a good quality milk chocolate. So much of the good stuff is dark, and I am quite partial to milk. Anyway, I tried them all so you can be more confident in your choice. Go try one! I am pretty sure you won't regret it! Let me know what you think of the bars, if you've ever had one, where you have found them to purchase, or whatever else you want to share! Stay tuned for PART TWO coming next week!
   
   
   
   

How I will eat my elephant....er...I mean...a LOT of chocolate

It has been overwhelming thinking about where to start with this blog. The world of chocolate is as vast as the world of wine. I don't quite feel up to purchasing a $14 bar I know I won't fully appreciate till I learn more about what makes it a $14 bar. But I can't simply wait until I become an expert to begin. 

So what do I do here?  Do I simply review chocolate, one bar at a time? Do I compare chocolates? Should I use a standardized ranking system? What bars do I even start with?

Answer: Power Rankings

I will begin my journey power ranking chocolate.

Power rankings are used in sports all the time, especially in football. According to wikipedia.org, "power rankings, can be directly provided (e.g., by asking people to rank teams), or can be derived by sorting each team's ratings and assigning an ordinal rank to each team, so that the highest rated team earns the #1 rank." In other words, power rankings can be entirely subjective, or entirely objective, depending on the source.

Here, the source is me. My power rankings will be entirely subjective and wholly biased. I will tackle one brand at a time, power ranking each bar, providing a brief justification for that ranking.

The first brand I will tackle in the coming weeks is

pronounced chew-WOW

Visit their website to learn about the brand, and find out where you can get their bars near you! 

 

(they are sold at Central Market, local folks)

POWER RANKINGS

WHAT IS A POWER RANKING?

Power rankings are used in sports all the time, especially in football. According to wikipedia.org, "power rankings, can be directly provided (e.g., by asking people to rank teams), or can be derived by sorting each team's ratings and assigning an ordinal rank to each team, so that the highest rated team earns the #1 rank." In other words, power rankings can be entirely subjective, or entirely objective, depending on the source.

Here, the source is me. My power rankings will be entirely subjective and wholly biased.

 
The following are links to all of my Power Rankings:

chuao - milk

chuao - dark

Alter Eco 

Hammond's

Divine  

Michel Cluizel 

Seattle Chocolates 

Seattle Chocolates - Spring Bars

Equal Exchange

IKEA Choklad

Waialua Estate

 
 

LET THE GAMES BEGIN

I was recently feeling defeated as I racked my brain for ideas for a bunch of upcoming birthday gifts, coming up empty. Two brothers, two friends. I didn’t have a lot of time to shop shop shop with a 2 ½ year old and 2 ½ month old. After some time, I thought of what I believe to be the solution to all of life’s problems: chocolate. Not just your run of the mill can-find-it-at-the-gas-station variety though, I wanted to give GOOD chocolate. Quality stuff. The trouble was, I did not have time to drive all the way down to the Theo factory in Fremont or The CHOCOLATE BOX in downtown Seattle. So I went to the closest place that I KNEW they sold Theo: Central Market. And when I walked down the candy aisle, the heavens sung. Fine chocolate covered the shelves from top to bottom and I had a hard time deciding where to begin. It was overwhelming. And then I had a revelation. I should eat my way through this aisle. Taste every brand, every bar, every truffle. So I am going to. And I'm going to blog about it.

Maybe my New Year’s resolution SHOULD be to cut back on chocolate. But it’s not. I’m jumping head first (or rather mouth first) into the vast world of chocolate.

And so it begins, my evolution to chocolate snob. Experience it with me. Evolve with me. Join me as I journey through the aisles of indulgence. Join me, for the love of chocolate.

Current Faves

Alter Eco: Dark Velvet
chuao: potato chip bar
chuao: pop corn pop 
Equal Exchange: Milk
John Kelly Chocolate Truffle Fudge Bites: Peanut Butter with Himalayan Pink Salt 
Michel Cluizel: Mokaya
Theo Chocolate Classic Bar: Salted Almond Milk Chocolate
Theo Chocolate Fantasy Bar: Bread and Chocolate